Miscommunication

I made a miscommunication today. This is not a rare occurrence. I often just say things without thinking a particular statement all the way through to its conclusion so I guess this shouldn’t be surprising.

I am sure you have never done this.

This morning as Matthew and I were driving to work (we have been carpooling since his injury) we were talking about a hypothetical situation. The situation is not an important part of this story so I’m not going to go into the specifics. His response to the situation surprised me so I said, “That surprises me. I didn’t know that about you.” Apparently the way I said this and the tone in my voice came across as disappointed and anything other than accepting and encouraging.

That was not my intention at all. In fact, I didn’t have an intention. I was just saying that I wouldn’t have expected Matthew to react to that situation in that way. I’m not sure this is a wrong response or reaction, but the way I communicated my response was hurtful.

I’m sorry babe. I hope I will do a better job going forward of thinking before I speak (that’s a tall order). I hope I will also recognize that we are two very different people and realize that having different responses is natural and expected because we are different and think through things differently (by the way, I’m not referring to having a different moral compass here). While I don’t know every little thing about you after almost 7 years together and am still surprised by you, I know your heart (which is tender and compassionate) and hope that I will continue to see the best in you.

I love you Matthew!